Fashion Accessory Fails, Back To Russia Without Love

baby-with-bathwater.mid-sizeAh, classy American consumerist approach to having a family. Single woman apparently decides a child is the appropriate lifestyle accessory and proceeds to import a child from afar — the trendy thing to do, don’t you know, even though plenty of American kids in foster care are desperately looking for loving homes. Alas, single woman gets more than she bargained for, as Russian child appears to come with certain bugs not covered by the warranty. Can’t be bothered to try to find a solution, and regretting the whole sordid affair much as if buying an iPod in the wrong color, single woman decides the product just isn’t all that it was cranked up to be and proceeds to ship a 7-year old boy alone with a one-way-ticket back to Russia, a note pinned to his chest that basically says, “my wanna-be mom decided I sucked, so here I am.”

“I am sorry to say that for the safety of my family, friends, and myself, … I no longer wish to parent this child. As he is a Russian national, I am returning him to your guardianship.”

That’s damn classy, Ms. Tenneessee parent-of-the-century.

Let’s see: first of all, evidently your idea of parenting was something akin to a rent-a-pet for the weekend. Convenient when it augmented your lifestyle, but not really something you could get into for the long run. Second of all, you didn’t even bother taking the poor kid to see a shrink before you kicked him out again? That’s really giving it the old college try — NOT. Seriously, your love for your “son” was so limited that when it turned out he wasn’t just coos and smiles and straight A’s you just couldn’t be bothered, but decided to ship him out of your life?

Hopefully Ms. Hansen will never be allowed to adopt again, and unless she genuinely realizes what she did to an already traumatized young boy and has some serious second and third thoughts about what “having a child” really means, I would hope she never has children of her own. Heck, it would start with finding a partner, and even that apparently is tough for her — perhaps that says more about Ms. Hansen’s interpersonal skills than it does about the Russian boy she played with for a bit.

I guess he was lucky she didn’t drop him off at the local Catholic Church as a donation to the priests, but shy of that, this is simply an epic fail. Poor kid. I’m sure he was not easy, and all the explanations about his condition may well be true — but if you commit to adopt him, then you adopt him warts and all, and if you genuinely have the kind of compassion required to adopt, then you deal with his issues, you don’t just throw him out like last year’s failed fashion.

Bitch.